My Fire Is Not Out


Matthew 3:11 He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.

When I was in the 6th grade I got baptized in Lake Superior. Although I was dunked in the icy waters, I was baptized with the FIRE of the Holy Spirit. A cool thing about fire is that it is hard to put out.

Life sometimes is plain hard. There have been days this winter where I would wake up and think, “it can’t get any worse….so today should only get better.” And then it gets worse. I have been drained physically and mentally to the point where the only way I can make it through the day is to “just breathe,” as written in the Johnny Diaz song.

I have been to this draining point several times in my life and in those times I could feel God carrying me. This time though it felt like God wasnt there, as if he didn’t care to listen let alone answer. Sheepishly and embarrassed I confided in my friend, “I don’t even know that I believe anymore. If God does exist He sure doesn’t want to show that He cares.” Heather’s response was, “Deep down you know He is there. That seed is still there. You just don’t see it because you are so physically exhausted.” The enemy was taking advantage of my exhaustion and blinding me.

Remember the cool thing about fire is it is hard to put out. Even when you think it is out completely, there are still coals and ambers deep underneath the “cool” ashes, just waiting to be rekindled. Sometimes they just need to be rekindled by getting in the Word or by just completely resting at God’s feet.

My fire is not out. My coals are still there, burning intensely. I still have my faith.

Blessings, Erin

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